Truly a compilation that rivals even the best of Farb or the Dude. 
Coke alert material if I ever read it...

-Sean


On Thu, 26 Oct 2000 18:42:50 +1000, billy@v3*.co*.au* wrote:

>Let's have a look at some of the Best of Dr Michael J Black... 
>
>
>Black (a non trimix diver), on the safest deep-diving project in the world...
>
>At 01:38  16/02/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>>(WKPP divers are going to get hurt, and are lucky to have made it this far
>
>
>Black - on chosing the right boat for technical diving....
>
>At 01:15  1/03/00 , mjblackmd@ya*.co* wrote:
>>as a fellow boat owner I too frown upon doubles in my boat. 
>>If I wore my double steel 112's, I would break my boat ladder 
>
>
>Black, on the drawbacks of doubles...
>
>At 07:40  31/05/00 , Michael J Black wrote:
>>Do you techno-weenies have a clue how despised you
>>are by some boat captains, with all your gear clanging around?
>
>
>Black, on the agencies that killed most tech divers...
>
>At 08:12  16/05/00 , mjblackmd@ya*.co* wrote:
>The agencies that have been in the business longest have enviable 
>safety records, a testimonial to their quality of instruction, given 
>the inherent dangers involved in scuba.
>
>
>Black, on the benefits of precarious gear rigging...
>
>At 11:23  8/11/99 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>My preference is to not clip the SPG to my left hip or chest D-rings. I 
>prefer to tuck the SPG on a long hose into my butt crack.  That's right, 
>between my legs, in the butt crack, which cradles the thing nicely, and I
>know where it is at all times by feel.  
>
>
>Black "If I can't dive without a computer no-one else should"...
>
>At 12:59  25/07/00 , Dr Michael J. Black wrote:
>>While we're on the subject of DIR, here are a few more of my "esteemed"
>>objections:  No computer (HELLO??!!), 
>
>
>Black - A Dive Legend In His Own Mind...
>
>At 13:07 16/05/00 , MJB wrote:
>>  As for my diving credentials, they've been posted too, but
>>let's just say I dive alot (over twenty years, and 1000 logged dives
>>in the last ten) and in fact, I'm going diving tonight after work.
>
>
>Black, on why he is an ignorant little drip-tray...
>
>At 02:12  26/05/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>>I am not trimix-certified
>
>
>Since he pretends to be an authority on mix diving, let's have that one
again...
>
>At 02:12  26/05/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>I am not trimix-certified
>
>
>Black's alternative to intelligent gear rigging...
>
>At 03:07  26/07/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>>As for better systems, mine works well and is quite simple:  no dives
>>below 220 feet, using a large primary, a 30cf (or 40cf) pony, and
>>40cf sling bottle(s) if needed.  No doubles, and no dives that require
>>more than 45 minutes of deco 
>
>
>Black, on hanging seven pieces of equipment off the HP hose...
>
>At 11:23  8/11/99 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>I often have to reach for the SPG (which is mounted to a console, that
>has a compass, knife, scissors, computer, slate, depth gauge, pencil) 
>mainly to read my compass.  My usual diving is in freshwater lakes in 
>Wisconsin, with poor visibility (yesterday vis was 3 feet in Lake Mendota,
>Madison, WI) and I rely on my compass for underwater navigation on a 
>regular basis. 
>
>
>Black knows better than the US Navy...
>
>At 10:49  1/02/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>>Thanks for posting the Navy info.  Frankly that is amazing, and makes
>>me wonder who's making the rules in the U.S. Navy. 
>
>
>Black, on how to choose the right regulator (like, ask someone who's 
>sponsored by a reg manufacturer)...
>
>At 04:49  16/02/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>>Simon L Hartley <shartley@sc*.ed*.au*> wrote:
>> > Is the R190 actually a better performing reg than the D400?
>>
>>This would be a great question for Jim Bowden, who currently holds
>>the world depth record on open-circuit Scuba.  Having spoken with
>>him personally about this, I can tell you that he likes both regs
>
>
>Black on "to be as stupid as me, learn from the worst in the business..."
>
>At 01:48  1/06/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>>As for my "extreme ignornat stupidity" were you referring to the pony
>>bottle with pO2 1.9 debate?  Thought so, and just FYI here is what TDI
>>says in one of their coursebooks (authored I believe by Jan Neal, who
>>IS a BEST diver, i.e. absent from this list):
>>"A small volume scuba cylinder of EAN39 carried with a diver for a
>>decompression gas can also be a redundant gas supply.  In the event
>>that the primary gas supply is exhausted, the diver can switch to
>>EAN39 and make a normal ascent.  If this emergency occurred at 130 fsw,
>>the pO2 for EAN39 would be 1.92 ATA.
>
>
>Black boasts coyly about his deep air experience...
>
>At 02:12  26/05/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>>I will not divulge how deep I have been on air, as if I haven't been 
>>crucified enough already. 
>
>
>Black forgets he just boasted coyly about his deep air experience...
>
>At 02:12  26/05/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>>I am not trimix-certified, and believe it or not, one reason is I have
>>an objection to TDI's requirement that Extended Range (on air) precede
>>Trimix. 
>
>
>Black on diving medicine - "Ignore the Pros. Trust Me Instead. I'm A
Hobbyist"...
>
>At 02:12  26/05/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>>Diving medicine has been a second hobby, and I have
>>been fortunate to have learned from some experts, whose names have
>>already been bashed on this list, so keep guessing.
>
>
>Black, the truly clueless, never lets ignorance hold him back...
>
>At 23:09  28/04/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>If you're going to dive Hogarthian, the long hose (5 or 7-foot) 
>should go under the right arm and around the neck.  This makes 
>sense in caves, for air sharing.  
>In wrecks, I have a problem with it in that the length of hose 
>represents an entanglement hazard.  I prefer a 40-inch primary 
>hose, and recommend bungying your long octo to your tank(s), or 
>even diving with a 40-inch octo hose realizing that your buddy's 
>going to have to ride your ass in an air-sharing emergency.
>
>
>Black, on not knowing shit from clay...
>
>At 12:59  25/07/00 , Dr Michael J. Black wrote:
>>While we're on the subject of DIR, here are a few more of my "esteemed"
>>objections:  Scubapro regulators (do you turds know we call these 
>>Scubaflows in cold water, and I mean icy cold).  Want
>>a better system?  Start over, unless cave diving is your only diving.
>
>
>Black "You need lots of dive experience to talk to me (cause I don't have
any)"...
>
>At 02:32  19/07/00 , Michael J. Black wrote:
>  You're a wannabe, lying, sniveling, loudmouthed, ranting POS, DIR's 
>poster boy.  Suck it up, weenie.  Or better yet, try logging a few dives, 
>puppy.  MJB
>
>
>Black finally demonstrates his true level of diving expertise. Fish feeding...
>
>> > What is good to use. Someone suggested cheese-wiz, but this seems a
>> > bit unearthy to me. Any comments on this.
>>Well if you must know, Nabisco Easy Cheese. It comes in a can and
>>withstands the hydrostatic pressure from descent, if you get to dive
>>besides snorkel on your trip.
>>Mike Black
>
>
>Thanks for the laughs, buttcrack
>
>rgds billyw
>
>ps If any of you would like to supply the gems of buttcrack's ignorance
>that you have collected, send 'em in. I'll compile and repost 'em here and
>on rec.scuba. This moron should have a warning label attached.
>
>
>
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