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I lost too many brain cells in the 70's. I'm lucky I can remember where I
live, much less what gas I put in my tanks 2 weeks ago. I always mark my
tanks. As far as other divers using my tanks. Well the real problem is what
do I do then, here some idiot is using my gas that I cut tables for. And I am
stuck with what is left?? You mean I might lose a dive because of this
#$@hole!!! Up here in Ct we have figured out some ways to avoid this problem.
First off your tanks should be real gnarly. I mean nasty. My 2 sets of
Gene120's look like they just came back from Bosnia. The Nitrox stickers are
all chopped up. The paint is all flaking off. They look like a real
techdivers tanks should look. Guess what? no one ever touches my tanks. To
get this look you can either dive them for a few years. Or just tow them
behind a car for a few blocks, works great.
I've got a buddy who likes to keep his gear nice. So he always brings a can
of cat or dog food along. and throws some all over his tanks. People always
think he blew lunch and stay away. Just remember to rinse them off before you
go in as the fish will be a little too friendly. And you might have to kill a
few.
I think the real problem that everyone is avoiding is the abundance of these
new air divers who would do such stupid stuff. I mean these guys are really
dangerous. This summer I did a dive on the USS San Diego mid summer. There
were 3 boat loads
of divers doing check out dives. I jumped in early did my 45 and I'm swimming
back too the line when all of a sudden there were lights, wieght belts and
overwieghted divers crashing all around me. it was terrifying. I made it back
to the line okay and was doing my hang when this herd of stampeding divers
came up the line shaking me all to crap. Ruined my zipless puck+ tried to
knock me off the line. I thought I was getting mugged. And then they come up
too you with thier eyes all bugging out and want air!!
Hey Dude you got to be certified for the stuff I got. And no I won't give you
your gear back. And the overwieghted ones were all mad because I popped them
up with a lift bag, go figure. What gratitude.
After that I realized you have to keep them off the boats, Here are a few
tips. When they ask you why you carry all those tanks here is a good answer."
They protect me from the sharks. This dive site w'ere going to is called the
Great White Feeding Frenzy of Death " .
Also, always ask the captain in a real loud voice how he is doing with his
drinking problem?
I always laugh real hard about thier gear setups. Then I pretend to call my
insurance agent on my cell phone and try to buy life insurance for them for
the day.I love that.
Another good one is to ask where they got thier air, then roll your eyes and
say Oh my god!! I thought he was arrested after the last problem.
And hopefully after all this work I will have a nice empty dive boat to do my
technical diving off of.
Doe's any one else have any more suggestions on keeping these new divers off
the boats??
Doug Kitchen
It's the Panic that kills you.

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